Conforming

Where has the condition of what you may believe about ‘how’ you need to be, in order to fit in originated? Looking at the depth of this question can find you questioning in contemplation as to who has shaped society’s way of conforming. Can you see there has not been one type of belief from one individual that can be pin pointed or explained. Can you see that the range is so vast, so intricate, so varied and unique to each persons perspective that it seems quite crazy that any belief system as to the way you ‘should’ be in order to fit in seems quite absurd. Sure, it is a conditioning layered with the need to be approved by parents, friends, coworkers and even our communities in general, even on a broader level, to ‘fit in’ with the whole boxed in concept of what everyone else is doing, being, and playing a role to feel adequate to fulfil the needs of what others expect of you. Don’t be harsh on these people that you feel may have misled you or conditioned your worthiness to b, or shaped you in the mould of what they perceive is accepted by them, for they too, have been shaped and you may understand on a deeper level that they most certainly may not have the awareness of this conformity.

Can you see that maybe when you are around certain people you feel the need to change the way you are to conform, to feel the need to belong?  The origin of what the belief is inside of your mind has been shaped around the perspective that you have about yourself, and what has been instilled in you since childhood.  Often times, you may have captured the essence of the mis-alignment to your true self but have continued on to keep ‘fitting’ into a certain persona around people that require you to behave in a certain way.

There may be times with a few like-minded souls that you have been more freer to behave in a more honest way with yourself and felt a moment of liberation in experiencing this.  This can be a sure sign that you can remind yourself to start or continue to make your approach in each interaction from this truer expression of you.  However, if you look deeper at these interactions too, you may also view deeper growth required to free up the true you.  This will come naturally over time as you continue to build the support system of honesty with yourself.

Many people are already aware of the ‘moulding’ that has taken shaped in our lives, what the ‘norm’ is and what is accepted.  However, capturing and viewing your innate ‘knowing’ of the mis-alignment with your truth is established further when you take notice of your responses towards other people and them to you.  For example, just say, you are talking to a certain person that expects you to react in a way that they are choosing, however, this does not feel good to you.  Sometimes, have you seen that you may show a reaction for the other to approve of you, to accept the normal response and to not ‘create waves’, so to speak.  And then you sense that inner you, not responding well inside of yourself and truly do know that you have chosen the ‘easy’ option, the easy ride to establish the continual response that is adequate to fulfil the needs of another.  This is when you are going ‘against’ your true core self.

If you wish, you may try out a newer approach to an interaction with a person of your choice in your life.  Some will be more difficult to ‘speak your peace’ with and others will find it easy to move along with your new found approach, it all depends on the other person’s way of choosing to respond and sometimes, how greatly they are connected to themselves.  But this has nothing to do with you, in how another responds to you if you are speaking your peace.  Remember that the way another perceives you, as long as you are coming from an honest, loving approach is not your concern.  It is all about your approach now to being more transparent with you as you witness your own actions to relate to your alignment with yourself.  You may, for instance, not respond to the other person’s mentality of playing the victim role or any negative talk, that may be constant bickering, whinging or moaning about life.  Maybe they are use to you responding with sympathy, agreement or in return with your own problems.  However, if this has never completely ‘sat well’ for you then now would be a good time to respond in a way you choose maybe by not enabling the behaviour or altering the conversation to flow in a more positive direction.  And depending on the person, this may be met with disapproval of them towards you or a variety of intricate responses.  Take notice of the feelings in you that present themselves, you may feel uncomfortable and awkward as you experience a newer part of yourself that you may not have met before.  This may be a little overwhelming, but hang in there with yourself and smile with the knowledge that you also are freeing up much room to expand into the truest version that you can be, without the need any further to ‘fit in’.  You may also remember that you are establishing what you will and will not put up with in your life, how you care enough about yourself to not feel drained after this regular interaction or anything else that does not match your own alignment with what you feel, you will also be building up courage to continue being honest.

These interactions can be so incredibly varied and unique as to your own relationships in your life, that to talk about each scenario is too vast to compare.  However, if you can relate to the feeling you sense in yourself when you are not being true to you, then this is wonderful as you are getting real with the one you are.  Remember, this will get easier as you continue to walk in alignment with your truth.

People will get accustomed to you responding in your unique way or else they will disappear from your life altogether.  This can happen quite naturally as you will begin to energetically shift and the release of old relations will no longer serve your highest growth.  But as long as you have alignment within you and are honest with yourself, you will find a greater freedom of expression to live your life as you choose and be further able to expand and grow in your self knowledge.  You will also be inspiring others to be more transparent with themselves too.  Although, remember that this is not your intent.

Take a stand to show up in alignment with who you truly are, allow your unique expression to be present for you.

Love’s Blessings

Sariah Sistar